It is not uncommon for married couples and those in long-term relationships to encounter a dry spell where there is a lack of intimacy, physically and
This is often a result of situational circumstances and life transitions such as having children, long days at work, death in the family and stress. The
kids, family, and career are all important but the relationship must remain a priority in order to keep that zest
We can often get too comfortable in our relationships and stop putting in the effort to show up for our partners and we allow the romance to
Responsiveness is at the heart of attraction. The golden rule here is to pay attention.
Let’s look at what makes a good relationship– dedication, trust and comfort- meaning being in a
partnership with someone who you feel comfortable with and whom you can laugh with. Responsiveness is the base of this triage.
The interesting thing is, if you’re not feeling attracted to your partner it’s because you are not responding to your partner. You would think it would be
the opposite. “I’m not attracted to my partner because they don’t pay attention to me”
But it’s actually the opposite, the person who is not feeling desire is the same person that is messing up. They’re the party that is tuned out, disengaged
or clueless to their partner’s needs.
Schedule a date night out of cooking. Cooking together also creates opportunities for touch. Even for a person who never feels like having
fun and acts cold, it doesn’t matter where or how one simple touch on an arm is enough to release Oxytocin.
Bonding over the stove also enhances relationships by strengthening communication skills, from picking out recipes to arranging the grocery,
to the meal preparation – the whole exercise substantiates the team spirit.
Shrimp, oysters, cacao, maca, celery, asparagus, avocado, chilli peppers, watermelon, etc. are food items popularly referred to as aphrodisiacs. Cook them
together for a more intimate experience.
Light some aromatic candles for a little mood elevation, and enjoy the fruits of your mutual culinary efforts with a glass of sparkling wine.
Make a ritual out of this special at-home date night where both of you cook the meal together.
Mark it as a weekly or monthly ritual that you can both excitedly look forward to. Waiting for this special time with great anticipation will foster warmth
in your relationship at a high level.
2. Don’t stop dating each other
It doesn’t matter if you have been married 1 year or 40 years. You absolutely must continue to date your partner.
Vibrant marriages take work and commitment but they are also full of fun and play.
When you first met, you bonded over sharing experiences together and having a blast together. Set time aside minimally once a month to plan a date that is
mutually exciting. Get dressed up for one another- remind your partner how great you look together.
Prioritizing couple time cultivates happiness and passion in the relationship.
3. Engage in new activities and tasks together
This could be anything from taking on a new hobby to cooking a new recipe. There are ots of great hobbies for couples. Having fun together is essential to remain close.
Consider cycling, archery, traveling, tennis, zip-lining, couples massage and let’s not forget about sexual pursuits.
Sex is imperative in happy, romantic relationships. Make the time for it!
Try new positions and have sex places other than the bedroom- Under the stars in
the backyard, the car, the kitchen, etc. Create new moments and memories through exploration- variety is the spice of life.
4. Show verbal and physical affection
People fall in love with those who make them feel good about themselves.
Compliment your partner and verbalize the ways in which you appreciate them and see them. This also activates your partner to start
thinking about all the things they like about you. Grab their hand when walking together. Cuddle on the couch while watching a movie.
At the base of every relationship is the relationship you have with yourself.
Be sure to be filling up your own cup daily with nourishing foods, movement and activities that light you up. When you feel good, you are
confident, loving and have much more value to add to your relationship.
You will feel more attractive and happy and these traits will shine through making you more attractive to your partner. Think about encouraging your partner
to work out and eat clean with you. Couples that sweat together, stay together.
6. Seek professional guidance
Speaking to a relationship coach, either as a couple or individually, is a great way to figure out if there are any relationship issues that need
to be resolved in order to attain that emotional closeness and sexual attraction once again.
Relationships are one of the most important areas of life, they affect our health and overall well-being. High-quality relationships do require work, but the
result of that effort is the ability to experience vast amounts of joy!